Tyranny of the Urgent

All too often, we, in the church or ministry, in the name of Jesus, do great things at the expense of our families. We take phone calls during family time. We plan trips and missions for church and are not able to bring our families. We neglect issues with our kids or spouse because another issue came up with someone you’re discipling. We cast vision for our ministry. All the while, our family is sitting by watching, and the kids are learning what God is like through the parent in ministry; and this is not a proper picture of what God is like. If we lack vision for our ministry, someone else will step in and begin casting vision or stay on you to do so. But if you lack vision for your family, others won;’t know or at least they won;t step in and they, “hey man, you’re lacking a vision for your family. Let’s get on it.

We can say this about people who hold jobs that aren’t in the ministry too. We all fit in to this category to some extent. Thus we have, the tyranny of the urgent. The important falls to the wayside while the urgent is constantly pounding on your door. While you make plans for everything else other than your family, the enemy is implementing his plans in your family. Let me throw some stats out there for you to chew on. This specific poll was taken among professing Christians by the Barna Group regarding the disengagement of 20 somethings in 2004:

      -43% of American Christians make their commitment to Christ by age 13. Only 23% of Christians in the US became     

       believers after age 21. 

      -Of those who make a commitment before their teen years, 50% were led to Christ by their parents and another 20% by  

       a friend or other relative. Only 7% by a pastor. 

     -61% of today’s young adults - had been churched at one point during their teen years but they are now spiritually 

      disengaged (i.e., not actively attending church, reading the Bible, or praying). 

     -Only one-fifth of 20 somethings (20%) have maintained a level of spiritual activity consistent with their high school 

      experiences. 

    -Another one-fifth of teens (19%) were never significantly reached by a Christian community of faith during their teens 

     and have remained disconnected from the Christian faith. (Barna, 2004)

     Ongoing research by The Barna Group on these matters consistently demonstrates the powerful impact a person’s 

     worldview has on their life. Their studies have also pointed out that a person’s worldview is primarily shaped and is 

     firmly in place by the time someone reaches the age of 13; it is refined through experience during the teen and early 

     adult years; and then it is passed on to others during their adult life. Such studies underscore the necessity of parents 

     and other influencers being intentional in how they help develop the worldview of children.

     George Barna, who has directed this tracking research since the early Nineties, pointed out, “There are a several 

     troubling patterns to take notice. First, although most Americans consider themselves to be Christian and say they 

     know the content of the Bible, less than one out of ten Americans demonstrate such knowledge through their 

     actions. Second, the generational pattern suggests that parents are not focused on guiding their children to have 

     a biblical worldview. One of the challenges for parents, though, is that you cannot give what you do not have, and 

     most parents do not possess such a perspective on life. ” 

If these stats aren’t alarming to us, then I don’t know what else will get us to the point of seeing that it is imperative that parents begin taking serious their role of building faith at home and living out the Gospel. Cut out the urgent, unless it is what’s really important! If you are awakened and are saying: “I’m on board, what do I need to do to get started?” Here’s what I say to do based out of Deut. 6:4-9:

1. V. 4: You need to believe that it is God alone who brings life, and in Him that we live, that we move, that we breathe, and that we have our very being, not anything else!! Acts 17:28 (paraphrased) If you haven’t already put your trust in Jesus, do so today, for your sake and your family’s sake.
2. Vv. 5-6: Then, press on to to know the Lord. Let your life look the same as what you tell your kids. In Hosea 6:3 it says: “Let us know; let us press on to know the Lord; His going out is sure as the dawn; He will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth.” Oh that we would press on to know the Lord. It says in Acts 1:14 that: “All these (all that were in the upper room) with one accord were devoting themselves to prayer...” They were pressing on together! 
3. V. 7-9: Pass it on to your family. Have a vision for your family. Other’s will have vision about church, work, school, hobbies, etc...No one’s gonna come by in the near future saying: “You know what, I was thinking the other day that this would be good for your family...here’s a vision!” For a lack of vision, the people perish...so do families. (Mark 10:16) Bless your kids!! Trust in God alone to bring life to you, press on to know Him more, and pass it on to your kids. Learn to sift through the urgent so you don’t pass over what’s most important. Love God. Live It. Share it!
4. Lastly, get a good understanding of the Gospel and let it not just be the foundation of your family, but the walls, the insulation, the windows, the roofing, the trusses, etc...you get the point. Teach your kids about Jesus. Trust in Jesus. Read His word. Pray often (as a family too). This is how your teaching will match your living. Until the Gospel in transferred from your head to your heart, you won’t be able to live what you teach with any conviction.

For the love of God, and the good of your family; love God first and your family second. The people in your family are your first priority disciples. Ministry will always happen in and out of the church, but not in your family. It’s up to you. Don’t let the important things in life get squeezed out by the everyday urgent.